As the mother of a teenager, I understand the temptation.
School is out. Schedules are looser. Work is still demanding. The weather is miserably hot. And sometimes it feels easier to let our kids disappear into their phones for hours than to constantly battle over screen time.
But as parents, we need to be honest with ourselves: if our children spend the entire summer glued to their phones, that is ultimately our responsibility—not the government’s, and not the tech companies’.
In recent years, we’ve seen a growing movement to blame social media platforms, smartphone manufacturers, and technology companies for what many describe as an epidemic of screen “addiction” among young people. Some have even called for lawmakers or other government regulators to step in and solve the problem through new laws, restrictions, and mandates.
I understand the concern. Technology can be distracting. Social media can be unhealthy when used excessively. But before we ask politicians to fix our families, we should ask whether we’re exercising the authority we already have.
The reality is that we parents possess far more power over our children’s technology use than any government agency ever will.
We can take the phone away.
We can set limits.
We can monitor usage.
We can require passwords.
We can disable apps.
We can establish screen-free hours.
We can have conversations about responsible technology use.
We can learn to use the many parent features and tools available to us.
Most importantly, we can model healthy habits ourselves.
My personal favorite is remaining logged in on my son’s social media accounts to keep tabs on who he’s interacting with, about what, and for how long. He hates it just as much as I hated my parents sitting nearby and listening to me talk with my friends on the phone when I was his age, or reading notes they found in my room. That’s ok. Keeping him safe and healthy is my job (and his dad’s). Every time he complains about it, I ask, “Why do I do this?” Reluctantly, he replies: “Because you love me.”
Parenting has never been easy. Every generation faces its own challenges. Previous generations worried about comic books, television, video games, and countless other influences. My grandfather used to talk about the dangers of playing cards. Today’s challenge happens to fit in our children’s pockets and contains seemingly infinite options for entertainment.
We may not always like what our kids are into or understand how to navigate online platforms as well as they can, but exercising our parental rights and responsibilities isn’t hopeless—nor do we get a pass because it’s hard or inconvenient. It also doesn’t mean we should surrender our responsibilities to the government.
A free society depends on strong families making decisions for themselves. Parents know their children better than government officials do. We understand our kids’ maturity levels, strengths, weaknesses, personalities, and needs. And even if we like our elected officials and generally support most of what they do to represent us, we are far better positioned to decide what boundaries make sense for our own kids and families. We should be respected and even challenged to carry out that sacred responsibility instead of being asked to put blind faith in another law, regulation, or assurance that can never replace active parenting.
Summer provides a perfect opportunity to put those principles into practice.
If your teenager is spending six, seven, or eight hours a day scrolling, don’t start by blaming the technology platform or asking your legislator to “do something.” Start by creating some family rules.
Set daily limits.
Designate technology-free times during meals and family activities.
Review app usage together.
Talk openly about online behavior, digital citizenship, and the importance of balance.
Require phones to stay out of bedrooms at night.
Then offer alternatives.
Repeat the age-old directive to “go outside and play” (without the phone). Send them to the park, the pool, the basketball court, or the backyard. Sign them up for camps, sports, volunteer opportunities, church activities, or summer jobs. Give them books to read and projects to complete.
Better yet, take a break and join them when you can. Share some laughs while putting together a puzzle or playing a competitive board game.
“But that’s so BORING!”
Some of the most valuable experiences of childhood emerge from boredom. When children aren’t constantly entertained, they learn to create. They invent games. They build things. They explore. They think. They develop independence and problem-solving skills.
We’ve become so uncomfortable with boredom that we often treat it as a problem to be solved immediately. In reality, a little boredom can be one of the healthiest things a child experiences.
Of course, technology itself is not the enemy. Smartphones and social media are tools. They can help young people learn, communicate, create, and stay connected. The goal isn’t to eliminate technology from our children’s lives. The goal is to teach them how to use it wisely.
That lesson cannot be outsourced.
No law can replace an engaged parent.
No regulation can substitute for family conversations.
No government program can provide the guidance, accountability, and love that parents provide every day.
This summer, let’s resist the temptation to hand our responsibilities to someone else. Instead of demanding that the government manage our children’s screen time, let’s embrace the authority and responsibility that come with being parents.
The solution to excessive phone use isn’t more regulation. It’s more parenting.
Our children don’t need politicians to raise them; they need us.
